Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Not Positive - with Edit at the end

Ok.  I admit it...I'm discouraged today - and frustrated.  Yesterday I had a great day - felt good, accomplished stuff - not everything that needed doing but was able to accomplish.  The house was warm and the sun was out.  The grapes are all juiced for starters...kitchen was cleaned...bathroom counter was cleaned...and I figured out what all was going out when the circuit blew.  I even walked. And while I turned in a write-up on one student - and had issues with the same student at the beginning of afternoon route things overall went well.

Today...I dragged out of bed knowing I didn't sleep well.  The sun is going to shine at least some today.  The house is cold and I just don't feel good.  And I'm emotional.  Had issues with my student this morning - as well as kids at my last stop telling me there's no seats.  Kids wouldn't move in.  I know they all hate being 3 to a seat but on Wednesday mornings they are pretty much guaranteed to have at least a few seats that way.  I can't help it - it just is.  And Dipstick didn't make the bus this morning - nor did he text me to tell me where he was.  I'm feeling overwhelmed with everything going on this week - parent/teacher conferences this afternoon, bus driver committee meeting tomorrow morning and Grief Group tomorrow night for Dipstick (I have to be there for that even though he's old enough to do stuff alone).  For Squirrel parent teacher conferences are positive - I feel like it's a waste of the teachers time for me to go.  But I go anyway.  For Dipstick - it's frustrating.  He's passing all his classes currently thanks to the fact that he tests well.  But he simply doesn't bother to do the homework and nothing his dad or I say or do makes a difference.  So I'm going to go - simply because I believe it's important as a parent - even though I don't "need" to for Squirrel - and not going to have any answers for Dipstick's teachers.  I need to get the grape juice finished and canned and laundry folded at least. I have eggplants to dehydrate...and zucchini.   At some point I need to get bills paid and checking accounts balanced.  And I need to get a seating chart done for my bus kids - it's partly done mentally but needs to be on paper and finalized.

I've been thinking about life seasons a lot recently - Hubby and I are looking at basically being "empty nesters" in a year.  I'm realizing now that I will have more time to focus on being creative then and that's the time to do so.  But still looking at balance also - especially now. Balance is necessary but feels non-existent at the moment.   I'm not saying this well at all but am getting sleepier by the minute.  Hoping a short nap will help both physically and mentally.

Edited to add: Last batch of juice in the canner.  Will have 9 pints, 3 quarts and 1 jelly jar of grape juice.  Had a short nap and called and got a subscription straightened out.  Also folded 3 loads of laundry.  Hubby is out looking at incoming jobs so I won't need to make him lunch.  Since we don't have leftovers at the moment that's kind of a blessing.  I always have to laugh ruefully - he goes from having a few days up to a week without a lot of work then suddenly has a whole bunch of jobs come in.  This tends to happen right when he's getting really worried about not having enough work. The challenge is balancing them but the work has always been there when it's needed.  God provides.  


5 comments:

Needled Mom said...

Thank you so much for you kind comments. You come through as a "no reply" blogger so I have no way of responding other than through your blog. Oh gosh, Edith, it does sound like everything is in a tailspin at the moment. It does fet better. I had one son who I hated those parent teacher conferences for the same reason. He is now grown with three little ones of his own and can now see what we went through back then. Sweet revenge....as I always say.

Scrappy quilter said...

I hope things improve for you. Sending hugs your way.

Karen said...

It didn't seem all negative. And you have accomplished a lot.

God does provide--my little story--seven cord of not great wood arrived this week--looked like leftovers. Not much hope of getting any more as everyone ordered as early as April this year. Yesterday got a call for five more cord--brought and delivered between rainstorms, and this wood is beautiful! Cut nicely for stacking.

My thoughts this week were along the lines of...."the Lord can make 7 cord last the winter, or He can provide more, or maybe the winter won't be so long...."

Love you. Hang in there, and be encouraged.

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